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another pound! yesssss


babymk

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so i'm only going to weigh myself on sundays and thursdays. they seem to be the days i actually get some results! so i was talking to one of my friends who also got the surgery done about how i hate that i'm not losing the weight fast enough. she tells me that mass weighs more than fat..i think..she continues with an analogy about how a basketball and golf ball weigh the same. the difference is that the basketball is full of air aka fat. she said it was obvious i was losing fat so she told me to keep doing what i was doing. so that gave me the confidence to keep on track no matter how discouraging that scale makes me feel. i know its not about what's on the scale either. it's about inches and how you feel. i feel great and i notice my clothes that i saved from 3/4 years ago when i weighed less, fit once again. during that time i was the same weight i am right now. i'm happy about that. i think i'm scared of not losing and staying at this weight or something and never getting to my goal. i really hope that doesn't happen because just thinking about it makes me want to cry. i've never been skinny in my whole entire life so just to have it for even one day i would die happy. i don't want to be fat my entire life..i don't want to be fat for even another year! i can't take it anymore. i don't want to lie to myself and say i'm happy being fat when i'm not. i can't truly be happy knowing that i'm excluded from certain activities or projects because of my weight. it's not fun to be limited by something you know you did to yourself. so i'm the only one to blame and the ONLY ONE to fix it. so with that said i'm going to go exercise now ^_^

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