I feel silly even bringing this here to the forum but I dont know where else to go. I had my heart set on getting a band. A little background : 5' 11", 265lb size 22. 31 year old nurse married 4 years no kids fat since senior year in high school, FELT fat since I was 13. (I realize now that I wasnt fat at 13 but I was overweight enough to feel inferior to the girls who could wear tops with their tummy out)
Anyway, I was dead set against a gastric bypass because it was actually cutting my stomach and switching my innards around. When I found out about the band I was ecstatic. I made the mistake of mentioning it to my mom and she let me have it "you are avoiding the real problem which is self control" You will never conquer this if you just go in and artificially interfere" etc ... My family is also religious and believes that a lack of faith and prayer is a large part of my inability to conquer my addiction to food. Oddly enough I do agree with that as GOD has helped me through the ugliest parts of life. HOWEVER, I spent my 20's fat and I do grieve for those years if that is possible. Now, my family history of vitiligo has come into my life. My once flawless skin has started to lose its pigment in spots and eventually I will literally look like a spotted cow (NO JOKE I AM SERIOUS) as I am African-American it looks even worse. I don't think I can stand to be overweight on top of this and I dont want to grieve for my 30's in ten years because I am afraid to dissapoint my mom. Any advice appreciated. I am really getting depressed over this as I am getting older and want a shot at a decent normal life before these spots get to their worst. Even six months of total normalcy would be awesome. HELP !!