You will "get" this title more as we go along. For now, let's just say it refers to the period of my life when my main focus was raising the two human beings I had produced. My concerns were minor compared to the awesome task of supporting and nurturing my daughters to adulthood. Mr. Willing was not much a part of this. In his defense, when he had said, "So, you're one of those women who doesn't want to have children?" after a night of competition disco dancing, I had answered, "Actually I'd like to have one. Do you want to help?" He replied, "Sure, I like to as long as I don't have to be responsible," and we were in business. He happily settled into my house as king of the world, but it was my income tax business and my paid support team that kept it all going. My younger daughter kind of sneaked in. Her big sister sometimes referred to her as "a terrible mistake", but I always refuted that, by saying, "Absolutely, not true. Calli was a happy accident.". She was my bonus. I was surprised at how difficult it was to get Papa to move along when the house became too small for both of us. Seemed that, in spite of his grouchy disposition, he was happy there. I was able eventually to get him to go - though he did leave behind his older daughter (10 years older than Minnie). Now I had three girls, ages 2, 5, and (God forbid) 15 - a preview of being a single mother to teenage girls. Yikes!
In spite of the hard work and responsibility, I massively enjoyed those years. It was my great pleasure to create childhoods for my daughters. At Christmas another neighbor & I would take the entire crew of our block's kids - about ten of them - to Disneyland. We ate all the goodies and brought candy home. Friday's were game night sleepovers at our house. Thick greasy pizza was featured, along with popcorn, and more candy. We went to the movies and sneaked in our own sugary snacks, we had gourmet picnics before going to the Hollywood Bowl (fried chicken and pie), we were honored guests at McDonalds, and when Krispy Kreams came to LA, we were at the grand opening. We did do things that didn't involve food. I didn't try to eat the Beanie Babies we rose at 4 AM to pursue, but pretty much everything else was fair game. Somehow, my girls - thankfully - escaped obesity, because I ate all the leftovers.
I would still, periodically, get totally disgusted with my ungainly girth and declare war on fat, go on a new fad diet and lose weight, but after each I would return to my old ways and gain back what I lost plus more. Sound familiar
It's getting quite cold here in Starbuck's and I'm giving a huge college graduation party (both girls - it took 9 & 6 ears respectively, but they have finally done it!) next weekend so I have lots to do. Next entry I'll tell you more about the "seesaw" days. Maybe you can identify ...if you want to hear it. Do you?