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why do i do this to myself!?!


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Ok, so here I am 2 days from now I will be flying out to Tijuana for my first fill. I know I need on cause the last few days I have been able to EAT. I just finished dinner and I feel as though I have eaten to much. I don't feel stuffed but I am full. I had two pieces of toast, a piece of salmon about the size of a deck of cards, and a spinach salad, about 1.5 cups or so. Not to bad but why did I eat the toast I didn't need it! The part that makes me the madest is that I wasn't hungery when I ate dinner, I had a late lunch, which was a sandwich. So now I'm so full of bread and calories I could cry. I did this before my surgery in my old life, I told myself that I would not do this in my new life. I did not want to sit and eat cause I'm bord or cause I think I might like it have something or hey I know that tastes great I should eat it cause I like it. What does this make any sence to you. Being over weight never makes any sence. Sorry for the rant but I just need to come clean.

I hope I have not done any damage to my pouch or band, I guess I will find out on Monday.

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Ok, so here I am 2 days from now I will be flying out to Tijuana for my first fill. I know I need on cause the last few days I have been able to EAT. I just finished dinner and I feel as though I have eaten to much. I don't feel stuffed but I am full. I had two pieces of toast, a piece of salmon about the size of a deck of cards, and a spinach salad, about 1.5 cups or so. Not to bad but why did I eat the toast I didn't need it! The part that makes me the madest is that I wasn't hungery when I ate dinner, I had a late lunch, which was a sandwich. So now I'm so full of bread and calories I could cry. I did this before my surgery in my old life, I told myself that I would not do this in my new life. I did not want to sit and eat cause I'm bord or cause I think I might like it have something or hey I know that tastes great I should eat it cause I like it. What does this make any sence to you. Being over weight never makes any sence. Sorry for the rant but I just need to come clean.

I hope I have not done any damage to my pouch or band, I guess I will find out on Monday.

JNLEBEAN, please stop beating yourself up. like countless people have said before, you can't unlearn old habits overnight - you've been doing it for years. use this opportunity as a learning experience, then forgive yourself and start anew at your next meal.

xoxo babe

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You haven't had a fill yet, girl! You're HUNGRY! Practicing portion control is a good thing, and should happen as much as possible. However, you have no restriction, thus, you are having to do all of the work. You WILL get to a point that you will NOT have to do so much work, and you will be able to have the band do it for you. It sounds like you ate a healthy meal... it could have been MUCH worse. Chin up... you're doing FINE.

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Ok, so here I am 2 days from now I will be flying out to Tijuana for my first fill. I know I need on cause the last few days I have been able to EAT. I just finished dinner and I feel as though I have eaten to much. I don't feel stuffed but I am full. I had two pieces of toast, a piece of salmon about the size of a deck of cards, and a spinach salad, about 1.5 cups or so. Not to bad but why did I eat the toast I didn't need it! The part that makes me the madest is that I wasn't hungery when I ate dinner, I had a late lunch, which was a sandwich. So now I'm so full of bread and calories I could cry. I did this before my surgery in my old life, I told myself that I would not do this in my new life. I did not want to sit and eat cause I'm bord or cause I think I might like it have something or hey I know that tastes great I should eat it cause I like it. What does this make any sence to you. Being over weight never makes any sence. Sorry for the rant but I just need to come clean.

I hope I have not done any damage to my pouch or band, I guess I will find out on Monday.

We have ALL been in your shoes! I have come to realize that it is going to take very hard work on my part, this is just one thing that will make it somewhat easier. I still don't have the restriction I know I am supposed to have & some days I can't eat until 3 or so in the afternoon. So, by the time I can eat, I feel I eat too much some days.

It is all about your fill, and maybe not your first one. Just be patient and when you eat wrong, forgive yourself. You have a lifetime of habits that you are changing and it won't be over night. ((BIG HUGS))

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Yeah, thanks guys. I just needed to come clean and write it down! Jen, I hope your fill on Monday in Florida goes well. I will post once I'm done at the OCC.

Hugs to all of you! Thank you. Jenelle

Jenelle,

You are doing great!!! You have lost 40 pounds and yeah you ate bread. Im sure everyone of us on this forum has eating something we are not suppose to eat. LORD knows I have! Keep your head high and next time you see bread, just try to be stronger and let yourself know that that is a no no food and do your best. That is all we can do, is our best. Congrats on your weight loss and good luck with your fill!

Carrie

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You haven't had a fill yet, girl! You're HUNGRY! Practicing portion control is a good thing, and should happen as much as possible. However, you have no restriction, thus, you are having to do all of the work. You WILL get to a point that you will NOT have to do so much work, and you will be able to have the band do it for you. It sounds like you ate a healthy meal... it could have been MUCH worse. Chin up... you're doing FINE.

Exactly!!!! I'm sure you are just fine and don't worry, here after a while bread will be a distant memory. As you get fills the ability to overeat will be come less and less. Right now it is all willpower on your end, but as each fill comes and goes that will change. I'm on fill 3 and still need a bit more, but my hunger is significantly less than it was.

Keep it up you are doing fine!!!

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(((((((((((((((((((((Hugs to you))))))))))))))))))))

Jnlebean,

A big congrats to you to log our food and post your message. Because you took that step, next time, you'll have a different result. It's progress...not perfection.

I am very proud of you and so excited that you are going for your first fill!

xo.

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