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I haven't posted in a LONG time....


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Hello everyone, I've lurked on the forum, but refrained from posting. I don't think I can or should try to give advice to anyone when I can't even take care of myself. I've failed miserably with my band. I lost a total of 32lbs. since March 25th [haven't been on the scale, so I'd guess I've gained at least 5 of that back.]

I eat way too much and I think I've stretched my pouch. [i think I have a good fill level, I just push it to the limit with eating and have even been in pain after eating.] I eat the wrong things, ice cream, cake, pie, cookies.... I drink while I eat, every meal, every day. I eat what I want, not what I should.

I have no care here in the States and I can't afford to go back to the OCC. Our money problems are very serious and this only adds to my food obsession. Any local Doc I speak to won't touch a patient banded in Mexico. I knew going into this that it wasn't a magic wand.... but I did think it would be easier to pass up food or at least eat less. No such luck for me, the obsession's still there and stronger than ever. I'm 44 yrs old and I'm stuck at what to do. I read on here how everyone's doing so well and sticking to the lap band guide lines and I'm truely thrilled for you all, I just wish I were doing as well.

To any Newbies that may be reading this: I'm not writing this to scare anyone and I don't regret getting the band [Dr. O and staff are tops!!] but please make sure you have after care lined up. If you can afford to go back to the OCC, that's the best, but if you can't, make sure you have a Doc in your area that will take care of you. I don't have anyone to turn to and I'm not sure what I'm going to do from here. I'm afraid my food addiction may have won this battle. Thanks for listening. Darlene

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This post breaks my heart more than anything else because you've lost your dream before it even started. You sound so defeated. Your pain is palpable and your words are final. They don't have to be that way. You think you've stretched your pouch but you don't know that to be true. Is there no FillCentreUSA or whatever everyone else is going to anywhere near you? There has to be resources. You got the band, you were that tenacious, now you need to grind down and do the same for a fill doctor.

You are self destructing, hun. You lost that first 32 pounds which means you know bandster guidelines. You lost the pre-weight to get the surgery so you've done the liquids thing. START AGAIN with or without a fill. Get yourself back on track. You have to get out of this downward spiral and you have to do it now. You are 44 not 94. Get yourself back to the proper headspace. Go back and read all the posts, read all the WLS books, do the before and afters, talk to us, talk to somebody. We are here for you. Rant, rave, let it all pour out, we'll listen BUT DO NOT GIVE UP. If you can't find your way back on your own let us help you.

Help us to help you. I'm here and I'm listening.

Jann

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Hi Darlene,

Just like any other substance food can be addictive. I consider myself a food addict and like any addict I know that I could be prone to relapse. I was once a member of Overeaters Anonymous and like any other person seeking recovery I was told to take things one day at a time. Tomorrow is a new day and you can change your life just by making the decision to do so. I agree with Jann, you have the band, start at square one if you have to. Call the OCC or e-mail them. If you do have a fill centre USA in your area they are a great aftercare resource. I have just had my first fill through them and they said I can call or e-mail anytime as I am now a patient and entitled to get any needed help from them that I need.

I know that I often, sometimes on a daily basis, hold on too tight. I think that if I can't be perfect or have the perfect day of eating correctly that I am a failure and everything can go to pot in an instant. Lean on the people on this forum....I have found myself checking in a couple of times a day and it reminds me that I am not alone in this fight.

Take good care of yourself, even if you don't have money you can still take a bubble bath and know that you are worth the change that you so badly want to make in your life.

So glad you said something today, I have had the fears that you have expressed in your post and I appreciate how you feel!!!

Cheers,

KIM

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I am no expert and have not even been banded. I changed my mind because of what you are going through right now. But I am down 23lbs so far.

I have decided to get to the route of the problem. Have you tried counselling? Overeaters anonymous or even Weight watchers where there is a support group?

Nothing will ever change if you don't deal with why your eating. I know as I am almost 40 and have dealt with this issue all my life.

Best of luck! Don't beat yourself up!

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Hi Darlene, I am sorry to hear that you are struggling.

No one said it would be easy, it certainly is not, especially if you don't have the restriction you need to eat the ideal 3/4 cup of food per sitting. But you do have good restriction, which is something alot of us struggle to get.

I am new, only banded for a little over 4 months and so far I still have the drive to get the weight off and you need to get that drive back too. You did amazing at the beginning and then fell back into the dark hole of eating junk food, it happens, but it's time to crawl back out and get back on track. I know you can...we all can!!

Like the others have suggested, try counselling or a weight loss program to keep you on track, whatever it takes, you have this band for life, you might as well use it to it's full potential.

If there is anything I can do to help you get that drive back, you just holler...I am always here!!

Take care!!

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Darlene please dust yourself off, pick yourself up by the boot straps and get a fresh perspective. I can't say anything anyone else hassn't said already. I care and am here for you.

You CAN do this.

:lb4:

Each day is a new one. I agree you should go on liquids for as long as you can to help with any pouch issues you think you may have. Perhaps the pre-op diet using 2 shakes a day an then a frozen dinner?

Please come here for support and inspiration.

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Hi Darlene,

Just like any other substance food can be addictive. I consider myself a food addict and like any addict I know that I could be prone to relapse. I was once a member of Overeaters Anonymous and like any other person seeking recovery I was told to take things one day at a time. Tomorrow is a new day and you can change your life just by making the decision to do so. I agree with Jann, you have the band, start at square one if you have to. Call the OCC or e-mail them. If you do have a fill centre USA in your area they are a great aftercare resource. I have just had my first fill through them and they said I can call or e-mail anytime as I am now a patient and entitled to get any needed help from them that I need.

I know that I often, sometimes on a daily basis, hold on too tight. I think that if I can't be perfect or have the perfect day of eating correctly that I am a failure and everything can go to pot in an instant. Lean on the people on this forum....I have found myself checking in a couple of times a day and it reminds me that I am not alone in this fight.

Take good care of yourself, even if you don't have money you can still take a bubble bath and know that you are worth the change that you so badly want to make in your life.

So glad you said something today, I have had the fears that you have expressed in your post and I appreciate how you feel!!!

Cheers,

KIM

Kim, I love your pic!!! Thanks for sharing.

Jann

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Hi Darlene,

I just got my band last week and I am a newbie, but not an expert of giving advice as to what you should do...BUT...!

You need to refocus on your goal again. If you have to, go back to the way you felt before you had your surgery and remember that feeling of how you are going to reach your goal weight. BELIEVE in the band and yourself! Be more positive and motivate yourself to do this. I can't say anything more than what the others have already said...but it is never too late! Get energized again and get the glowing feeling of I CAN DO THIS!

Come to this forum and ask for help...that is what most of the bandsters who have lost their weight because they can associate with how some of the issues others are having. Listening, asking, and doing - all ties into one another.

Sorry...just can't see you really bombing out when you've just started and you are not giving yourself another chance. As my Mum have always said to me, "When you are feeling down and out, lift your chin up and smile and start over with a smaller reachable goal". So, that is what I am challenging you to do Darlene! Chin up, smile and just take baby steps and go forward from there.

We are here for you!! Talk to us...if it takes to getting you back to the basic, isn't it worth it?

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Darlene,

Sweetie....I feel for you. We have all struggled with weight for a long time which is why we all have the band, but it is only a tool to help us along the way. I've come to realize, I still have to put forth the effort to not eat bad things. The band will only assist me if I follow the rules.

We all have "off" days where we eat more junk than other things, but you just have to chalk it up to a bad day and start over with the right mindset the next day. None of us are perfect, and we all feel like you from time to time. You are not alone, and that is why this forum is so important to us all!

I took alot of guts to post your feelings and struggles, and we are all here to help you get through it. I hope you find the fill doctor you need locally so you can get back on track. Maybe while you are searching for one, you can try what the others suggested and go back on the pre-op diet for awhile. It would get you used to eating smaller portions and maybe by then you'll have located a local doctor.

Best of luck to you, and keep your chin up!

Denise

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Darlene,

I can sympathize with you. ><' Although I have lost some weight, lots more inches than what the scales show, I feel like I have not done as great at those here on the forum. I find myself eating lots of junk foods, because I know thats what will go down easier. I don't know how you can eat and drink though, thats impossible for me to do.

Anyway if there is no Fills Center USA in your area, you can call Carolyn or one of the other care coordinator from the OCC. Before I finalized my appointment for the Lapband, I had them give me a list of physicians that were available in my area that would do follow up care if I had any problems. So you can use them as a resource to find a physician near you to that will do follow up care. Don't give up, if you lose any, its better than gaining. We have to remember we didn't put it on overnight

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This post breaks my heart more than anything else because you've lost your dream before it even started. You sound so defeated. Your pain is palpable and your words are final. They don't have to be that way. You think you've stretched your pouch but you don't know that to be true. Is there no FillCentreUSA or whatever everyone else is going to anywhere near you? There has to be resources. You got the band, you were that tenacious, now you need to grind down and do the same for a fill doctor.

You are self destructing, hun. You lost that first 32 pounds which means you know bandster guidelines. You lost the pre-weight to get the surgery so you've done the liquids thing. START AGAIN with or without a fill. Get yourself back on track. You have to get out of this downward spiral and you have to do it now. You are 44 not 94. Get yourself back to the proper headspace. Go back and read all the posts, read all the WLS books, do the before and afters, talk to us, talk to somebody. We are here for you. Rant, rave, let it all pour out, we'll listen BUT DO NOT GIVE UP. If you can't find your way back on your own let us help you.

Help us to help you. I'm here and I'm listening.

Jann

Thanks Jann for your kind words, I appreciate everyone's responses.

There are no fill centers in my area and I can't afford to go any distance right now. I probably could use a small fill, but that's out of the question at this time.

I will try to get my crap together and get back on track,... you're right, I have to get in the proper headspace. Thanks for letting me lean [ha!] on ya. Darlene

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So glad you said something today, I have had the fears that you have expressed in your post and I appreciate how you feel!!!

Cheers,

KIM

Thanks Kim, I'm so glad for this forum and have highly recommended it to people because everyone's so supportive.

I am going to try harder, I promise! Darlene

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Thanks Jann for your kind words, I appreciate everyone's responses.

There are no fill centers in my area and I can't afford to go any distance right now. I probably could use a small fill, but that's out of the question at this time.

I will try to get my crap together and get back on track,... you're right, I have to get in the proper headspace. Thanks for letting me lean [ha!] on ya. Darlene

We're here for you, hun!

Jann

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I am no expert and have not even been banded. I changed my mind because of what you are going through right now. But I am down 23lbs so far.

I have decided to get to the route of the problem. Have you tried counselling? Overeaters anonymous or even Weight watchers where there is a support group?

Nothing will ever change if you don't deal with why your eating. I know as I am almost 40 and have dealt with this issue all my life.

Best of luck! Don't beat yourself up!

teyann,

I have thought about counseling but Hubby's insurance sucks and with our money situation, I can't afford it. Considering that the Doc's around here won't take me on as a patient, I doubt they'd let me "play" with them in counseling sessions either.

I've thought long and hard about my over eating and my obession with food and I don't think I have any deep, dark reasons for it. I truely believe that I just love food, every aspect of it, think about it, dream about it and enjoy it totally. I don't think I have unresolved issues that make me eat, I just totally love it and of course, I can't get away from it like people who are addicted to drugs or alcohol can.

I did weight watchers about 8 years ago [the points program] and I didn't like it. I did do LA weight loss a few years ago and did really well, but gained all the weight back +. Thanks again, Darlene

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I was trying to answer everyone individually, but I can't keep up!! :D

I want to thank everyone who responded, you don't know how good it makes me feel that you all cared enough to send me your kind words. Like I said in a previous post, I'm not sure how I'm gonna handle this, but I don't think I have issues with food. [Other than being head over heels in love.] I eat happy, sad, mad.... there's no rhyme or reason.

I do know that I want to lose this weight, get healthy and happy. I will "check in" here more often and express my feelings and keep myself in line. This forum's the best....

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I googled food obsession and found these sites. There are tons more I just didn't list them.

http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/211

http://www.amazon.com/End-food-obsession-b...m/1MGH4ZNTM52KW a list of books that may be available at your local library

http://hubpages.com/hub/Addiction-Treatmen...-Food-Obsession

http://shopping.msn.com/prices/stop-overea...-proven-program

http://www.oprah.com/article/omagazine/hea...00108_breakfood

http://www.shrinkyourself.com/food_addicti...sion.asp?bhcp=1

Maybe have a boo, Darlene, and see if there's anything helpful in there? We really want you to succeed!

Jann

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Hello everyone, I've lurked on the forum, but refrained from posting. I don't think I can or should try to give advice to anyone when I can't even take care of myself. I've failed miserably with my band. I lost a total of 32lbs. since March 25th [haven't been on the scale, so I'd guess I've gained at least 5 of that back.]

I eat way too much and I think I've stretched my pouch. [i think I have a good fill level, I just push it to the limit with eating and have even been in pain after eating.] I eat the wrong things, ice cream, cake, pie, cookies.... I drink while I eat, every meal, every day. I eat what I want, not what I should.

I have no care here in the States and I can't afford to go back to the OCC. Our money problems are very serious and this only adds to my food obsession. Any local Doc I speak to won't touch a patient banded in Mexico. I knew going into this that it wasn't a magic wand.... but I did think it would be easier to pass up food or at least eat less. No such luck for me, the obsession's still there and stronger than ever. I'm 44 yrs old and I'm stuck at what to do. I read on here how everyone's doing so well and sticking to the lap band guide lines and I'm truely thrilled for you all, I just wish I were doing as well.

To any Newbies that may be reading this: I'm not writing this to scare anyone and I don't regret getting the band [Dr. O and staff are tops!!] but please make sure you have after care lined up. If you can afford to go back to the OCC, that's the best, but if you can't, make sure you have a Doc in your area that will take care of you. I don't have anyone to turn to and I'm not sure what I'm going to do from here. I'm afraid my food addiction may have won this battle. Thanks for listening. Darlene

Hey honey, first of all ((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))) and try not to beat yourself up. I'm not sure what to say other than, I am kind of in the same boat. I've had 5 fills now and still nothing. Even my husband said to me today that maybe this was just not meant for me. I don't happen to BUY that, but it IS discouraging. I haven't gained any and my eating habits have most definitely changed for the better over the year, but I am not seeing any real huge weight loss either. And any that I do get, is from my own will power since the band apparently isn't working. I have an appointment tuesday with a local doctor and if it doesn't go well, I will have to figure out how to get back to Mexico and see whats wrong. WIsh we could go together but I also understand the money part of it. Having gone there 3 times this year already has gotten us broke. I sure never expected all of this to happen. I DO have one suggestions though, try taking selenium. THe fill docotr in Maryland said that heavy people seem to have a deficiency in that and she has seen many people lose wieght just by taking that supplement. I am taking it and although the scale hasn't moved, my huge stomach HAS gone down quite a bit! So, why not give them a try. It might be what you need to get back on track. Or another suggestion is to go back on protein drinks. I find myself sticking to plan better when I am back on those. And I make my own so they are very filling and keep me satisfied.

I haven't posted in while either but had to get on when I saw yours. Don't give up, not yet! I was close to giving up myself, but not yet! I am still determined to be thin by my 50th birthday which gives me one year and 2 weeks! So get yourself a good goal and that could help too. And remember, I am only an e-mail away if you need anything!!!

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Hey honey, first of all ((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))) and try not to beat yourself up. I'm not sure what to say other than, I am kind of in the same boat. I've had 5 fills now and still nothing. Even my husband said to me today that maybe this was just not meant for me. I don't happen to BUY that, but it IS discouraging. I haven't gained any and my eating habits have most definitely changed for the better over the year, but I am not seeing any real huge weight loss either. And any that I do get, is from my own will power since the band apparently isn't working. I have an appointment tuesday with a local doctor and if it doesn't go well, I will have to figure out how to get back to Mexico and see whats wrong. WIsh we could go together but I also understand the money part of it. Having gone there 3 times this year already has gotten us broke. I sure never expected all of this to happen. I DO have one suggestions though, try taking selenium. THe fill docotr in Maryland said that heavy people seem to have a deficiency in that and she has seen many people lose wieght just by taking that supplement. I am taking it and although the scale hasn't moved, my huge stomach HAS gone down quite a bit! So, why not give them a try. It might be what you need to get back on track. Or another suggestion is to go back on protein drinks. I find myself sticking to plan better when I am back on those. And I make my own so they are very filling and keep me satisfied.

I haven't posted in while either but had to get on when I saw yours. Don't give up, not yet! I was close to giving up myself, but not yet! I am still determined to be thin by my 50th birthday which gives me one year and 2 weeks! So get yourself a good goal and that could help too. And remember, I am only an e-mail away if you need anything!!!

Hi Mona and thanks for respnding! I'll look for selenium when I'm out.... can I get it at Wal-mart? I'll have to Google it and learn more about it, I wonder how our bodies use it and what it has to do with weight gain\loss.

I wish I knew what my problem was, why I want to eat constantly and why I can't control it.

I did buy some slim fast shakes yesterday and am going to use them for breakfast and lunch for awhile. I'm worried that I've stretched my pouch and I hope I can try to reverse that.

Have you tried the Snickers protein bars? They are really good and I know that some women LOVE chocolate and they're a good fix. They have 20 grams of protein.

Thanks again to everyone who responded, wish we all lived closer so we could visit each other and kick each others asses when we needed it!!! :air_kiss: Darlene

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Hi Mona and thanks for respnding! I'll look for selenium when I'm out.... can I get it at Wal-mart? I'll have to Google it and learn more about it, I wonder how our bodies use it and what it has to do with weight gain\loss.

I wish I knew what my problem was, why I want to eat constantly and why I can't control it.

I did buy some slim fast shakes yesterday and am going to use them for breakfast and lunch for awhile. I'm worried that I've stretched my pouch and I hope I can try to reverse that.

Have you tried the Snickers protein bars? They are really good and I know that some women LOVE chocolate and they're a good fix. They have 20 grams of protein.

Thanks again to everyone who responded, wish we all lived closer so we could visit each other and kick each others asses when we needed it!!! :air_kiss: Darlene

Darlene, I just noticed you are 182 pounds! Look at you go girl! WL is gonna slow down naturally the closer you are to goal so don't get discouraged.

Jann

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Thanks Jann!! Actually, I weighed myself this morning and I held my breath...... I lost almost 1 more pound!! The way I've been eating, I don't know how that happened!! I've got work to do!

That's the spirit!!! YAY for you!!!

Jann

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