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I just cheated the band big time

ackovach
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ackovach Supreme Member

ackovach

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Hi all,

This was a very long winded rant. I am a bit embarrassed about posting all that personal stuff, so I removed the post....

Thank you Stormy & TheRedhead for your kind, intuitive words. You tremendously helped me get some perspective on the situation.

I know we all have our battles.

With my most heartfelt thank you,

Amy

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The Redhead Advanced Member

The Redhead

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Hi Amy,

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. My mom survived breast cancer and then got Alzheimers, which she passed away from 2 years ago. Life seems pretty unfair at times.

Men can be such boneheads some times, can't they? ..but then so can a few women, but I think women purposely make nasty comments, where men just open their mouths and stupid remarks flow out. My EX was always saying stupid things to me. For example... my all time favorite was... "I have neve seen anyone who looks so completely different when she puts make-up on. You look pretty good with it on. Don't you wish you could wake up with it on?". ...Remember I did say my EX. Another time he had a chat with the skinny neighbor lady about me. One day she walks up to my door looks at me and says, Ray said you used to be as thin as me. What happened to you? ...By the way... I was NEVER as thin as she was. ...later I found out those two were having an affair (but that was just one of his many).

It's tough not to eat and drink, isn't it. Old habits die hard. I find myself doing it way too often. Usually after my band reminds me with shooting pains. I try to stop drinking when I start eating but every once in a while (particularly when at a restaurant) I completely forget and then I have the nagging worry that I'm going to stretch my pouch with the fluid and food mixture.

Just stay positive about yourself. I know its easy to say and harder to do (take it from someone who lived it for 20+ years). Anytime you want to vent we're hear to listen.

Take care of yourself,

Denise

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stormy Supreme Member

stormy

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I read alot of pain in your post. Are you sure it is him you are angry at? I am so sorry for your loss. I have not lost my mother yet physically but mentally I have and I am angry about it. I know the pain of loss. From what I read and I may be wrong but I read your sadness about your loss. Have you shared this with your husband, or anyone you are close to? Are you lashing at him, not just because he is a stupid man, which most are, but because you are in pain? You have every right to be upset. Loss is very painful and losing someone so close is very hard. But the one thing I would causion you on is to make sure that what you feel you have some way to deal with it. Coming on here is a great start because we care for you. But eating and overeating is not a good way. The band is important to you. Dont let anyone or anything stop what you wanted and that is to lose weight and be healthy. It is so easy to go there, trust me I know. But look at the big picture. You may still be greiving and that is normal. Find someone to talk to that you can trust. If possible, journal about how you feel. Getting it out helps and it may keep you from overeating again. As far as he is concerned. I am very open with my husband, I tell him exactly how I feel. If he dont like it too bad, but I dont see anything wrong with you telling him that you just need to be left alone right now. That you need some time and that maybe if he left you alone for a bit, you could work all this out. That is just my opinion, I may be way off base but men are dumb, sorry guys, sometimes they just dont get when we are having an issue. My husband has to be told I am having an issue and then he will leave me alone to work it out. Keep posting, it will help. I am glad you feel like you can share, it is important. Have a good day.

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taras2girls Member

taras2girls

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Oh Amy,

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time right now.

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your Mother. That must be hard.

Please don't let your husband dictate your weight loss goals. No man is worth that.

Reading your post, I'm glad I'm single! Well, not really, but he does need to be more

sensitive.

It is good that you felt comfortable to share your feelings. It doesn't sound like you

ate all that much. Anything now extra to us bandsters feels like too much. Think about

how you ate before the band.

Keep your chin high, and remember. The forum is open 24/7!

Tara

ps. if your hair is too short, it will grow!

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mona-camille Supreme Member

mona-camille

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Well I missed this, but you know, you should never feel embarrassed about posting rants and raves. How many times have we all said that we are like a little family here. Ranting and raving can be very therapeutic and having us all around as friends can help you tremendously too! Don't ever feel embarrassed honey, because I for one, always respond to these types of posts more than any other because I realize that people are reaching out and need a shoulder. And a shoulder is one of the easiest things to lend! So, whatever happened, I hope you feel better now. (I have lost a father and a sister and know the deep pain that can casue, so I am very very sorry to hear about your mom).

Redhead: If I could, I would find your EX-asshole, and kick him in the balls so hard, they would fly out his mouth!

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julieburns Supreme Member

julieburns

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Amy I missed the original post so am a little unclear. I think I have gathered that your mom passed away. Is that right. Recently? If so my deepest heartfelt prayers go out to you. I lost my mom 5 years ago and the pain is still unbearable at times, we were close though I don't know your situation. Anyway the loss of a parent is no easy walk. And then it sound like you hubby is being non-supportive for sure, but again I didn't read it so I am assuming from what others have written who read the post. Anyway so you overate, it will not kill you. Do not let the guilt cause you to spiral downward, that is so easily how it happens. Dust yourself off, pick yourself off and restart a new day. We all will have emotionally driven slips for the most part at least once, perhaps some are perfect, but I know I am not. You have come a long way in your journey and you can continue.

:lb4:

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Taz Advanced Member

Taz

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If I could, I would find your EX-asshole, and kick him in the balls so hard, they would fly out his mouth!

Holy cow. Remind me not to piss you off.

(I say knowingly, shielding my nards just thinking of that pain)

Taz

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denisem Supreme Member

denisem

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Amy,

I missed your original post as well, but please know I'm so very sorry about the loss of your mother. I haven't lost a parent, but I did lose my mother-in-law last year and we were very close. It's very hard on everyone when a loved one passes, and I'll pray for you.

Please don't ever feel like you can't express your feelings here...long or short....we are here for you and so many of us care.

God Bless,

Denise

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The Redhead Advanced Member

The Redhead

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Sure! What the hell, could be a lot of fun for me!

Hey Mona... you're getting a few offers here. Maybe you could charge and make a few bucks on the side. ...Anybody want Mona to do a number on their EX? LOL :lol:

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