Need your help/support/guidance - got an email yesterday from coordinator

[ericsmom]

....that my surgery date might need to be changed from Tuesday, 8/28 to Wednesday, 8/29!

It sounds like a small deal, but it's taking me 10 hours to get there to do this! On 8/30 (would be morning after surgery if I left), I would need to leave first thing in the morning to get to Orange, CA by noon. That leaves very little margin for error in terms of post-op troubleshooting and my rest.

So in the spirit of not rushing to eat and handling my feelings instead, here

[Clynn]

I think you're going to be surprised how well you feel after the surgery. I sure was. Unless you were planning on leaving the day after your original surgery date, I don't think a day is going to make all that much difference. You'll be fine, deep breath, relax. The clinic really is a first class operation and they would not be moving your surgery if they thought it would cause you harm.

[minnie]

....that my surgery date might need to be changed from Tuesday, 8/28 to Wednesday, 8/29!

It sounds like a small deal, but it's taking me 10 hours to get there to do this! On 8/30 (would be morning after surgery if I left), I would need to leave first thing in the morning to get to Orange, CA by noon. That leaves very little margin for error in terms of post-op troubleshooting and my rest.

So in the spirit of not rushing to eat and handling my feelings instead, here

[snowbird]

Ericsmom,

What bothers me most about your post is how conflicted you seem to be about the whole procedure. While the lap band is reversible if it doesn't work for you, I assume you are making a significant financial commitment to this. I don't get the feeling that you are on board emotionally with it. The surgery itself is not that big a deal and you should be able to travel the next day. But the fact that the change in dates has thrown you for such a loop seems to show you are really unsure about the whole thing. As everyone else here will tell you, getting the band does mean a real change in your behavior to make it work. I'm sure most of the people who get it have some doubts beforehand, but you need to reach the point that you feel the band is a necessary change in your life that you need to make in order to be healthier and happier. Are you at that point yet?

If you are, have you contacted your airline to see if they can reschedule you to a later flight, so you won't be in such a rush? The biggest problem I see in leaving the day after your surgery to catch a flight out of the LA area is the border. You can get hung up there for who knows how long, although OCC can get you through in their van quicker than most.

[ericsmom]

First, thanks all for your replies. It means a lot to hear from you and to know people are here to listen and help.

Snowbird - thank you for your thoughtful email! I know it's hard to really read into posts without seeing the person. I am very convinced of the surgery and the process -- although I do have a healthy dose of trepidation over the unknown emotional component that follows. I never once thought about not doing it, but traveling 3,500 miles to get it done is a task, especially with a young one in tow.

No, my feelings weren't as a patient, although the prospect of surgery didn't help my nerves -- I felt let down as a customer. My flights aren't changeable - as it is, it'll cost me an extra $500 if I need to change my plans to Wed -- I think that's a pretty high price to pay for a last minute change over which I had no control! Incidentally, I offered an alternative - I was prepared to do the surgery a day early because I was already in San Diego and could change that time around. That would have worked with my schedule, but the surgeon's roster was full -- I would have liked a choice.

Of course, if it was explained to me as an urgent personal matter of the doctor, or even something that couldn't wait - I would have been 100% on board and bent over backwards to accommodate. But I'm looking at this not as a "patient" but as a "consumer" -- and as a consumer, I felt let down. Does that make sense? Somtimes, the written word is hard to convey.

I'm also in healthcare, and while the best case scenario is definitely that one gets up and goes home, it's best to plan for the worst, and hope for the best, hence the extra day of "cushion".

That said -- let me tell you again how grateful I am for taking the time to write. This board really does have a wonderful support - that you would take the time to express concern about my emotional preparedness means a lot. I did get a feel last night for how HARD the post-op adjustment is going to be -- last night, I did succumb to food (and called to confess today..fortunately, still ok)

All the best to you!! Danielle

[snowbird]

Danielle,

Best of luck to you; I would probably be quite ticked about the last minute change myself, especially if you are bringing a young one along. The travel itself can be grueling, and when you add surgery to it, it would not be something I would look forward to! I was probably putting your "freaking out" thread together with this one and making some assumptions, and you know what that can do.

It is great to have the support and friendship of others who are going through this experience, or have already gone through it. I got to watch my daughter do this last year (we sent her on ahead as a guinea pig) and now my husband and I are getting banded together, so I have my support built in around me. Still, I sometimes wonder whether I really need to do this, even though I have gone through four or five previous weight losses from dieting that have fizzled.

Hope your trip to California goes smoothly, the Customs folks are fast and the LA traffic light! We will all be wishing you the best.

Chris

[NoWorry]

....that my surgery date might need to be changed from Tuesday, 8/28 to Wednesday, 8/29!

I think that every single one of your emotions and thoughts are perfectly justified. And I am really sorry that this happened to you. I know that in your place, I would be feeling exactly the same.

I'll just state the obvious, which I'm sure you already know: You are the patient. At the end of the day, you must feel totally comfortable and only you can decide exactly what this means to you. Don't short change yourself for someone else's convenience. And if you're not happy with the information from the co-ordinator (just an email? really?), I would get on the phone with Ortiz.

They have created a problem and have handed you the task of resolving it. That's not fair. Give them your facts and have them find the solution. And if it means that the doctors have to come in on a day they would otherwise get off, then so be it.

And if the change doesn't work for you, then just tell them it doesn't work for you. Not having read the email they sent, are they offering you an option or is it a fait accompli?

Would you please let me know how this gets resolved one way or the other? PM me if you need the name of another, extremely well qualified bariatric surgeon in Tijuana. He might still be able to fit you in on your desired date.

P.S. It's not disingenuous, it's dishonest.

[LoriBecky]

wow! the doctor has to be out, and I'm trying to work out changing 2 people's surgeries as best I can and now i'm dishonest.

I don't like the sound of that at all

NO you aren't the only surgery that day and NO we aren't rescheduling you so the doctor can take a day off.

I'm working so hard to try to make this work and this is what you think of me?

No Worry why do you enjoy stirring the pot so much?

ericsmom... I didn't realize you thought I was trying to put one over on you - I think that most of the forum (minus No Worry) knows me better than that! Please look to others to know that I work very hard to make this process go smoothly, but you know that sometimes things come up especially in a busy surgeon's office that can not be controlled.... this happens in the U.S. and I can guarantee you they don't go our of their way this much to try to keep you within your same schdule as much as possible!

I'm working 12 hour days here to try to keep patients contact level at the highest I can.... keep things going smoothly for over 4000 patients (you think because they've had surgery I'm not still working with them?) plus all the new patients and questions I get daily.

I'm sorry if I sound disappointed and upset that someone would question my integrity, but No Worry you are getting on my last nerve. Stop stirring the pot and add some insightful, helpful posts to the forum instead of being negative all the time. Yes... I'm scolding you. I think most of the forum knows what's going on here... as I can tell in the many private emails I get from people about you.

I would also add that telling the whole truth helps and as this is a medical forum and I can't disclose personal information I can't get into too much detail, but not everybody posts the whole truth all the time about their experience... and you those of you who are posting partial truths to make OCC look bad or yourself look more knowledgeable KNOW who you are, and I don't appreciate that either.

For those of you who know me and know my goal here I'd appreciate some of you posting back to those that try to make it look like I'm just trying to sell a surgery am an not for you afterwards... or speak up about the great experience you had at OCC or with me or our doctors to try to put some posts in their proper perspective.

ericsmom.... this isn't aimed at you! I really am trying to work out to keep you in the same schedule you had... but somethings are beyond my control, but I haven't given up!!! Please don't give up on me.

( ok.... my cry session is over... for today.

[FurEllie]

I think that every single one of your emotions and thoughts are perfectly justified. And I am really sorry that this happened to you. I know that in your place, I would be feeling exactly the same.

I'll just state the obvious, which I'm sure you already know: You are the patient. At the end of the day, you must feel totally comfortable and only you can decide exactly what this means to you. Don't short change yourself for someone else's convenience. And if you're not happy with the information from the co-ordinator (just an email? really?), I would get on the phone with Ortiz.

They have created a problem and have handed you the task of resolving it. That's not fair. Give them your facts and have them find the solution. And if it means that the doctors have to come in on a day they would otherwise get off, then so be it.

And if the change doesn't work for you, then just tell them it doesn't work for you. Not having read the email they sent, are they offering you an option or is it a fait accompli?

Would you please let me know how this gets resolved one way or the other? PM me if you need the name of another, extremely well qualified bariatric surgeon in Tijuana. He might still be able to fit you in on your desired date.

P.S. It's not disingenuous, it's dishonest.

Wow. I know I've had appointments canceled by doctors in the US and I can just imagine me calling them and telling them I HAVE TO HAVE AN EXPLANATION and they are responsible for any expenses I incur when they cancel, lol. And if they can't provide that, then they best be there when I show up and they just need to reschedule whatever came up.

Yeah, that would go over well. I would certainly no longer have to worry about being the patient as I'm sure they'd tell me to go elsewhere for my healthcare.

I just can't believe you called this "dishonest". Personally I think the OP probably should go the doctor NoWorry prefers.

[MikeyLikesIt]

....that my surgery date might need to be changed from Tuesday, 8/28 to Wednesday, 8/29!

It sounds like a small deal, but it's taking me 10 hours to get there to do this! On 8/30 (would be morning after surgery if I left), I would need to leave first thing in the morning to get to Orange, CA by noon. That leaves very little margin for error in terms of post-op troubleshooting and my rest.

So in the spirit of not rushing to eat and handling my feelings instead, here

[ericsmom]

Wow. Guys. Remember my goal, here. It was to feel better because rather than turn to food, I wanted to share my emotions. Mikey, you are the most reasonable in your assertion, I think.

By the way, water under the bridge now, but I had no idea that this was a forum moderated by Dr. Ortiz's office!! I actually didn't even mention his name on my first post because I didn't want this to be about him or the OCC (or you, Lori!) I was wondering why folks assumed it was him. So it wasn't at all intended as a targeted or malicious swipe. But I need an outlet for how I feel --that's what support ought to be, no?

Lori, you're right, I don't know you yet, although I hope to > You have been wonderful in so many ways -- but this is a very expensive (albeit priceless!!!) undertaking that I (as all of you) paid out of my own pocket, and I have different expectations than I would as an insured patient! I have kept it no secret from you that I am being thrown for a major loop with what seems to be such a small change but impacts my babysitting arrangements in CA, a hastily planned yet welcome family get-together after the fact in Orange since we're coming across the country, and a number of other things, not the least of which is my fear about having to leave the morning after surgery. Coming here was more to allow myself an outlet for my feelings, not to attack you, I promise!

By the way, since you're here, let me publicly thank you for offering me a free followup fill (fluoro included) hotel and transportation!

You know what would have helped, though? However busy Dr. Ortiz is, a quick call from him - a 5-minute one, to let me know himself that he needed to cancel me at the last minute - It would have been appropriate and much appreciated. It would not have taken much to make me a devoted and happy camper, which I'm sure I will be anyhow when I get this done!! Again, NOTHING to do with his technical skills, which I know to be wonderful.

By the way, I will absolutely believe your response to the scheduling, but do understand that I had literally just talked to Rene when he told me I was the only one scheduled for surgery -- possibly someone from Colorado but not set yet -- and then I got your email saying that my surgery was postponed by a day. I hope you can see my side about the "waiting list" issue....but I do not want to hurt your feelings. Far from it. Again, if I knew you moderated here I would have been far more circumspect to protect your feelings (I knew you participated, but I thought it was as a lapband patient )

FurEllie, I appreciate your perspective, but I don't think it's kind to ask me to go somewhere else because I had complaints about something. It felt like you were kicking me out, and I don't think that's fair. I have the right, I think, in this great country of ours, to express my sentiments -- and all people should be able to have that right, especially in a board that's designated to support one another. By the way, I mentioned that I work in healthcare, as does pretty much everyone I know. I know the kind of service you're talking about exists, but it is up to US THE PATIENTS NOT to accept that. As wonderful as doctors are, they are equal to us and need to abide by the same rules of courtesy as us. My dad's an OBGYN and he always took the time either directly or on paper to apologize to every pregnant patient whose appointment he had to reschedule due to an emergency c-section, etc. He recognized that it was a two-way street and that his patients had lives too that were impacted by his change. And he had the busiest practice in NY. I guess I still believe that good medicine combines technical excellence with service excellence.

Anyhow, my thanks again for all of your thoughts and comments. Danielle

[PAMMIE]

Wow. I know I've had appointments canceled by doctors in the US and I can just imagine me calling them and telling them I HAVE TO HAVE AN EXPLANATION and they are responsible for any expenses I incur when they cancel, lol. And if they can't provide that, then they best be there when I show up and they just need to reschedule whatever came up.

Yeah, that would go over well. I would certainly no longer have to worry about being the patient as I'm sure they'd tell me to go elsewhere for my healthcare.

I just can't believe you called this "dishonest". Personally I think the OP probably should go the doctor NoWorry prefers.

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING. IT'S NOTHING FOR SURGERYS HERE TO BE CANCELED EVEN THE DAY OF SURGERY AND RESCHEDULED. IS IT RIGHT, NO BUT THINGS COME UP AND HAPPEN.

RELAX, CALL YOUR AIRLINES AND SEE IF THEY CAN'T HELP YOU. LET US KNOW HOW IT GOES. I'LL

BE THINKING OF YOU

[NoWorry]

You are a real class act, Danielle. =D>

[FurEllie]

By the way, water under the bridge now, but I had no idea that this was a forum moderated by Dr. Ortiz's office!! I actually didn't even mention his name on my first post because I didn't want this to be about him or the OCC (or you, Lori!) I was wondering why folks assumed it was him. So it wasn't at all intended as a targeted or malicious swipe. But I need an outlet for how I feel --that's what support ought to be, no?

If you look at the top left of this page, you'll see the OCC emblem

You didn't seem happy with how you were being treated. NoWorry seems to know someone who he feels is just as good as Dr. Ortiz and offered you contact information. If money/family/babysitting/nerves/etc are that big of an issue to you, then it would only make sense to follow through with your plans for your specific date, albeit with another doctor. I apologize if you felt I was "kicking you out" - I was offering you an option that would meet all your specific requirements.

Your father must be a very good doctor. My mother is a midwife and I know she has had to reschedule patients MANY times due to, ooops, someone's baby decided to come early. I don't know if she personally calls people. Many, many, MANY posters here and other boards have called Dr. Ortiz's cell phone at all times of the day and night and talked to him or gotten a call back. If talking to him directly is important to you, and without putting words into Lori's mouth, that can probably be arranged for you.

Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

[ericsmom]

No worries, furEllie -- thanks for the response. It's so easy to misinterpret stuff on the board and I was feeling misunderstood....woe is me, right?? I do tend to be a little less than observant in some very basic things -- good point about the OCC! For some reason I thought this was a subset of LapBandTalk....looks so similar. Anyhow, my thanks - I will stick with Dr. Ortiz because I've done much research on him, and have talked to Mexican doctors in Tijuana who've trained in some of the best U.S. hospitals about him. Good news is - they all think that he and Dr. Martinez are great! How wonderful about the cell phone.

If there is any profession that is incredibly service-oriented, it's midwifery. My dad always had a midwife, and many times he would tell us how amazing they were with deliveries.

Thanks again, and I look forward to your guidance/advice during recovery!!

Danielle

[ericsmom]

You are a real class act, Danielle. =D>

My thanks Sanjay! I appreciate the wonderful words...Danielle

[NinnyEd]

wow! the doctor has to be out, and I'm trying to work out changing 2 people's surgeries as best I can and now i'm dishonest.

I don't like the sound of that at all

NO you aren't the only surgery that day and NO we aren't rescheduling you so the doctor can take a day off.

I'm working so hard to try to make this work and this is what you think of me?

No Worry why do you enjoy stirring the pot so much?

ericsmom... I didn't realize you thought I was trying to put one over on you - I think that most of the forum (minus No Worry) knows me better than that! Please look to others to know that I work very hard to make this process go smoothly, but you know that sometimes things come up especially in a busy surgeon's office that can not be controlled.... this happens in the U.S. and I can guarantee you they don't go our of their way this much to try to keep you within your same schdule as much as possible!

I'm working 12 hour days here to try to keep patients contact level at the highest I can.... keep things going smoothly for over 4000 patients (you think because they've had surgery I'm not still working with them?) plus all the new patients and questions I get daily.

I'm sorry if I sound disappointed and upset that someone would question my integrity, but No Worry you are getting on my last nerve. Stop stirring the pot and add some insightful, helpful posts to the forum instead of being negative all the time. Yes... I'm scolding you. I think most of the forum knows what's going on here... as I can tell in the many private emails I get from people about you.

I would also add that telling the whole truth helps and as this is a medical forum and I can't disclose personal information I can't get into too much detail, but not everybody posts the whole truth all the time about their experience... and you those of you who are posting partial truths to make OCC look bad or yourself look more knowledgeable KNOW who you are, and I don't appreciate that either.

For those of you who know me and know my goal here I'd appreciate some of you posting back to those that try to make it look like I'm just trying to sell a surgery am an not for you afterwards... or speak up about the great experience you had at OCC or with me or our doctors to try to put some posts in their proper perspective.

ericsmom.... this isn't aimed at you! I really am trying to work out to keep you in the same schedule you had... but somethings are beyond my control, but I haven't given up!!! Please don't give up on me.

( ok.... my cry session is over... for today.

Wow...

First off - RE: Lori... I just want to go on record on how wonderful Lori was when I was preparing for surgery last year, she was was helpful and always available to me either on the phone on by email when I was "the question lady". I have not needed to contact her since, but I know if I have a question or worry, I can always call her for assistance.

Ericsmom, I am sure Lori doing everything in her power to make sure this works for you. OCC is not about the money, Dr. Ortiz and the whole staff genuinely believe in this surgery and dedicate their lives to helping people like me and you loose weight and have a healthier life. They are simply the best anywhere, no question about it! I have not had one second thought about my surgery, it was simply the best thing (and the most important) I have ever done for myself.

Lori has had the surgery too, and has been very successful! She is not just an employee of OCC, she is a bandster, like the rest of us!

Good luck, Ericsmom, I am sure something will work out! >

[LaurenLeigh]

My flights aren't changeable - as it is, it'll cost me an extra $500 if I need to change my plans to Wed -- I think that's a pretty high price to pay for a last minute change over which I had no control!

Danielle, I was wondering why it costs so much to change your flights? I know we were going to change ours from San Diego to Atlanta and it was only $50 per ticket, which is usually the fee for most changes with most airlaines. I'm just curious as to why they would charge so darn much for a change... that's plain crazy! Lol.

Good Luck, I hope everything works out! :-h

~Lauren

[Donna34]

I'd appreciate some objective thinking on whether I should go through with this. For those of you on other forums, I apologize in advance for the redundancy!

Thanks, Danielle

Danielle,

If you have decided that weightloss surgery is the WAY you want to lose weight, then definitely go through with it. You will not be dissappointed, and Dr. Ortiz, and his staff are the best! If you just decided to do this on a whim, and didn't research the procedure, or really think about the changes you will have to make...maybe you should hold off on it for awhile, and think about it.

I was desperate to lose weight, and I'm SO GLAD I had this done, and I'm so glad I had Dr. Ortiz to do it!

As for the last thing you said, about posting this on other forums....I really wish you hadn't done that. People who go to MX for surgery, and the MX doctors that DO lap bands always get such a bad rap, from people on these other forums. They really tend to bash anyone who goes to MX for surgery. You will see after you have the surgery. And for a patient to be upset about things involving their decision to go to MX....well, that just adds fuel to their fires.

I'm certain that you will be pleased with your trip, and surgery, and the staff there as well. Try not to worry, and just relax. It will all be OK. We'll be here for you!

Donna